The Princeton Tory would like to congratulate the University of Pennsylvania on the election of Donald Trump, who graduated from Wharton in 1968. President-elect Trump will be the first Penn graduate to serve as president since William Henry Harrison. Members of the Penn community are no doubt elated to see one of their own enter the White House.
In fact, Penn was so excited to see its most famous alum win that Annette Reed, the faculty director of Fisher Hassenfeld College House that reportedly threw a party complete with coloring books, tea, chocolate, cats, and a real live puppy so her students could celebrate! As an “open safe space to process recent events,” this party surely allowed the 9.4% of Penn students who voted for Trump to revel in their victory and discuss their opinions of the new administration.
A commentator on Facebook rightly pointed out that not all Trump supporters are racist, sexist, or prejudiced. However, the commentator noted to these supporters, racism is not a deal-breaker. The same can be said about the countless liberals who worship Franklin Roosevelt despite his treatment of Japanese-Americans.
A petition circulating on Facebook calls on the University to protect students who are illegal immigrants by proclaiming Princeton a “sanctuary campus.” The petition also expresses that its signatories stand in solidarity with “persecuted undocuqueer individuals.” There’s no telling what this term means, but this portmanteau appears to be the zenith of buzzwords and claims of intersectionality.
Because the free exercise of religion is one of the most sacred and inviolable human rights, the Tory will strongly and unequivocally oppose any attempt by President Trump to curtail the civil liberties of Muslims on the sole basis of their faith.
Speaking of religious freedom, the Tory has been glad to see the American left vociferously stand up for the free exercise rights of American Muslims. This is a stunning and welcome departure from their treatment of Christian bakers who object to making cakes for same-sex weddings and nuns who do not wish to be complicit in the funding of birth control for their employees.
In yet another sign that the election has already had some strange effects on American politics, some Californian liberals are calling for “Calexit.” We are elated to see that Californians are finally embracing the fundamental conservative principle of subsidiarity and the belief that elected officials in a distant capital should not control local affairs.
The executive order giveth, and the executive order taketh away. President Obama’s executive orders on immigration (Deferred Action for Parents of Americans and Lawful Permanent Residents), contraception (the Little Sisters of the Poor controversy), climate change (Clean Power Plan), payments to health insurance companies (House of Representatives v. Burwell), and transgender bathroom regulations can simply be rescinded by President Trump. Problem solved.
President Trump should also immediately instruct the Department of Education to rescind and repeal its unconstitutional “Dear Colleague Letter,” which instructs public colleges to use a preponderance of the evidence standard in adjudicating claims of sexual assault. Moreover, he should ensure that the Department clarifies that political speech can never constitute harassment under Title IX.
The Democrats’ current political situation is untenable. Things will likely get worse for them in 2018, when the party must defend twenty-one Senate seats including those in the red states of Montana, North Dakota, West Virginia, Indiana, and Missouri as well as the swing states of Florida, Wisconsin, Ohio, Virginia, and Michigan. The Republicans, in contrast, must only defend Nevada and seven deeply conservative states. To make matters worse better, Democratic voter turnout in midterm elections is generally low. There is a very real chance that the Republican Party will control the House, the presidency, the Supreme Court, and a Senate supermajority in 2019.
The Tory would like to remind Lena Dunham, a radical feminist, admitted child molester, author of the wonderful New Yorker piece “Dog or Jewish Boyfriend? A Quiz,” that she promised to move to Canada if Trump won the election. “I know a lot of people have been threatening to do this, but I really will. I know a lovely place in Vancouver,” she said in April.
Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg also joked that she would leave the country if Trump won the election: “now it’s time for us to move to New Zealand.” Justice Ginsburg is eighty-three and has enjoyed an illustrious career on the bench. We hope she immediately steps down so she can enjoy a lengthy, well-deserved, and long-overdue retirement.